Vendor Behavior vs. Partner Mentality

Somewhere out there, a business is getting charged $2,000 a month by a vendor whose only interaction this quarter was emailing the invoice with the subject line “Per our agreement.”

Meanwhile, that same business is wondering why their projects feel stuck, their tech feels stale, and no one seems all that interested in helping them grow. But hey, the vendor answered that support ticket… three weeks late… with a link to a knowledge base article from 2017. Nice.

There’s a difference between someone who sells you stuff and someone who’s actually invested in how you’re doing. One is happy as long as the contract’s active. The other wants to understand what’s working, what’s not, and where you’re going next.

The problem is, a lot of companies think what they have is a partner—until they really need help, and realize they’ve been paying for vendor energy this whole time. You can spot it a mile away: no proactive ideas, no interest in the bigger picture, and definitely no accountability when things go sideways. Just more invoices and a vague promise that it’s “being looked into.”

If your IT provider, software consultant, or whatever-you-call-them disappears between billing cycles, you’re not being supported—you’re being billed.

So let’s talk about what actually separates the two. Because once you’ve worked with someone who shows up like a partner, you never go back.

Vendor energy feels like having a roommate who never does the dishes. They’re technically there. You see signs of life. But when you need them to show up, there’s always a reason they can’t.

That’s what it’s like working with someone who just drops off a service and disappears. You get the deliverables. You get the invoice. But you don’t get any real thought, care, or initiative. No one’s checking in to see if things are working. No one’s tweaking the process to make your life easier. It’s autopilot at best, and ghost town at worst.

And then there’s partner mentality. That’s the person who notices your systems are slowing down before you complain. The one who loops into planning calls because they want to make sure IT actually supports the thing you’re trying to do. The one who flags stuff that might affect your business six months from now—not because they want to upsell you, but because they actually paid attention.

With vendors, the relationship is transactional. With partners, it’s collaborative. You don’t have to send three follow-ups to get a reply. You don’t have to re-explain your business goals every quarter because they forgot. And you definitely don’t have to wonder if anyone on the other end actually cares.

You start to feel it in small ways. Partners ask better questions. They come prepared. They loop in the right people. When they see something going sideways, they speak up. And when they say “we’ll take care of it,” they actually mean we, not “good luck, let us know how that goes.”

On the flip side, vendor energy makes everything harder. You spend more time managing the service than using it. You chase updates, play middleman between departments, and deal with support reps who clearly haven’t read the previous ticket history. Nothing makes you feel more like a number than explaining the same problem to four different people while the “solutions team” rotates every month.

It’s not always obvious at first. Vendor energy can sound friendly. They can show up to the kickoff call with a slide deck and a smile. But when your business hits a weird corner case or needs extra attention? They’re suddenly very busy. Or they send you a new account manager who has to “get up to speed” all over again.

Meanwhile, the partner-type folks are in it with you. They get the messy stuff. They don’t disappear when things get weird. And they actually remember what you said on the last call, because they weren’t just taking notes for fun—they’re trying to help you build something that works.

Conclusion

If you’re constantly wondering where your provider went, why everything feels reactive, or whether anyone’s steering the ship besides you, it might be time to check the vibe. Are you getting vendor energy… or actual partnership?

You shouldn’t have to settle for someone who just ticks the boxes and cashes the checks. Support should feel like support. Strategy should come with input. And service should come with people who care if you succeed—not just whether the invoice gets paid.

Take a minute to think about your current setup. Are your vendors showing up like partners… or just like vendors?

Might be worth asking.